Malaprop

I haven't bought drugs for a very long time.  Maybe never.  I'm sure I have, but I don't remember ever passing money.  No, maybe once on an "investment" that went bad (I think you can read about that somewhere back in the blog), but I almost recovered the money.  But I haven't any connections to them now.

What I do know about buying drugs is that it is like buying adult toys.  For me, I mean.

"Well, you'll really have fun with this stuff."

"What?  Oh, no, no, you've got it all wrong.  This is not for me.  I'm doing a friend a favor."

Why do I say such things?  Because it is true.  But Jesus, really?

Mali, or Molly, or MDMA, is a crystalline drug with a very salty taste.  When placed on the gums, it is difficult to shake the flavor for a very long time.  Even scotch whiskey doesn't take it away.  So my friend tells me.  It is best placed in the rectum, I am told by a very good source.  By someone you like, I assume.  Or will like afterwards very much.  One hopes.

Of course, if you are buying either drugs or sex toys for someone else, chances are that you will get stuck with them.  If you are me.  And what would you do with a closetful of drugs and/or sex toys?  Surely the maids would find them, and, perhaps, your mother.  Or you would forget about them eventually and a new girlfriend or boyfriend would see them and all that would change.  No, the feds know what they are doing when they outlaw things.  It is for our own good.  Trust me.

But did you see the episode of "Mad Men" where Roger Stirling takes LSD with his wife?  Oh, shit, that was one of the best pieces of television broadcasting in the history of . . . .   And Roger, of all people, had a wonderful time.  Q tells me it is because he had been through the horrors of WWII.  Nothing could touch you after that, he surmises.  And probably he is right.

(Warning:  Strange Interlude Ahead)

In the 1960's, Dr. John C. Lilly was doing experiments with dolphins and LSD (source).  He is the one who cracked the dolphin language code and who invented the sensory deprivation chamber.  He also developed a blind spot in the center of his vision after  injecting some possibly impure LSD.  Eventually he was shunned by his colleagues.  But you will have to research that for yourselves.  The experiments that intrigued me most were the ones that involved his naked female assistant swimming nude with a male dolphin who tried to. . . well. . . you can research that one, too (one link).

Here is a photograph of Dr. Lilly's assistant. . . in case you were wondering.  Does he loos a bit like Megan Draper?  Mad Men and the Wonderful '60s.

But really, drugs have no effect on me at all.  I don't know.  I'm just built that way.  Now, though, I have to go to the liquor store.  I'm almost out of whiskey.