The Road to Hell

"They are all just piling on." He was looking down at the ground, shaking his head.

"Who?"

"It seems like everybody. It is just an avalanche. Once things start going wrong, it is like a damn has burst. Yesterday I went to the track to take a run. There was a group of guys just finishing up a soccer game. I was getting ready to stretch when I heard a voice yell, 'Get a haircut.' I turned around expecting to see somebody I knew, but I didn't recognize this fellow. I looked at him and half smiled, giving myself a minute to conjure him up in my memory, but that wasn't happening. He was short and thick and dark and confident. And he had a shaved head. So I said, 'Do I know you?' and he said 'No,' so I said, 'Oh, OK, Fuck You.' He smiled and rubbed his head to show me he was kidding. I don't know. The other day, a college kid stopped in the middle of the street to talk to a blonde in another car. I sat there for a minute, then I pulled my car in front of his so he couldn't go anywhere. I was just starting to get out when the girl pulled away, so I backed up to let him pull along side. He said, 'Dude,' and I said 'Dude what?' and he said 'C'mon,' and I said 'Get the fuck out of the street,' and he drove away. He was good looking and unconcerned and having fun and I just wanted to beat him. But as soon as he drove away, of course, I felt like an idiot."

"Dude," I said, chuckling. "Maybe you need to get a dog. I had a dog forever and she kept me good company."

"I don't want a dog," he said. "They're too much trouble."

"Get a stuffed dog, then. As Bill tells Jake in The Sun Also Rises, 'the road to hell is paved with unbought stuffed dogs. Not my fault.'"

"No, it's nobody's fault. I'm just fucked."

She was a good dog. Made me semi-famous. I'll tell more about that sometime.