Monday, October 12, 2009

Sleepwalk

I've done it. I've made an image. Several, really. You'll see.

It's funny how it comes about. You dream of something so long, something vague, really, nothing you've ever seen before, just color and mood and texture and feeling, and then you find it, only it is better than what you thought and you know it will get even better. It was like that now. The days. The nights. My heart will never stop pounding, I thought. Why isn't every place like this?

The autumn temperatures turned cool, much cooler than it did at home. The air was fresher, the moonlight brighter. I wished my father could see it. Everything was lovely. I'd never seen so many people smile this much. I was used to dour people, people who suffered without knowing, people who grew mean and bitter and thought it normal. People with sour faces with bad hair and bad skin and deformities of the body and the spirit. People who shriveled without dying.

It was Tuesday night, and Mick and I had gotten into the habit of going to a barbecue place that had a special for students. After dinner, we called our parents from the pay phone--collect. We called once a week, and once a week we got money from home.

"Hey, Dad, it's me. Did you watch the game last night. Yea, it was a good one. Yep, everything is fine. OK. Alright. Goodbye."

I breathed in the night air. Every time I exhaled, I thought, a little more of that is gone.

4 comments:

  1. yup.

    you took some photos. indeed. the number/letter thing really works for me.

    of course so does the subject.


    Sometimes I get upset with the N of your tales because he always seems to be looking for a way to shed some part of himself -- where he comes from -- maybe I love Wizard of Oz too much. Have I ever told you I know every word?

    Course I also recognize the blind innocence of N as well. There is always Dark and Light where humans are concerned. Even the Brightest and Shiniest of them.

    Somedays I'm envious of the fragility you impart into your posts ya know. :)

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  2. There's the boy...he is a natural as you are...creating a feeling, a mood...whatever it is it makes me happy and jealous at the same time!

    Autumn makes me feel that way about everywhere I am...well almost everywhere...

    great writing today...great photo...you're on a roll!

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  3. What will we do when he grows up? I guess they are always making more of them, but access is the key. Sally Mann wouldn't be famous, of course.

    The narrator of that tale wants to shed much. Later--much later--he deals in a different way. But I can see way ahead. I'm not just making it up as I go, you know. The trouble is putting the poetry into it. Some days, the magic all goes away.

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  4. Oh, yea--I know all the lines in Oz, too.

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