Fish Story

I don't get it. I used to be able to fish, but now, I don't do it so well. I was never an avid fisherman. Not a fisherman at all, really, but I liked getting out to the places it could take you. When I take this fellow out to teach him, or really, just to show off, we catch nothing. I can't remember all the knots for tying leaders and hooks. The lake is full of weeds now, not like it used to be, so clear and clean, and every time we throw the line, it gets fouled so that nothing would be able to find the bait if it was starving. It is a shame, I tell myself. No wonder kids don't go out any longer. It isn't as much fun. Things have been ruined.

So this kid's grandmother comes to town, and one afternoon when the two of them are alone, he tells her he wants to go fishing. This in itself to me is remarkable. He goes to the garage and gets his pole and tackle and they walk to the water. His first cast, he catches a tree branch and has to break the line. But he is determined. He walks back to the house and gets another hook, another plastic worm, and ties it all up by himself. Back to the lake, just his grandmother and him.

I'm on my way home when I get a call.

"You won't believe what I caught!"

"What do you mean?" I asked, worried that he has some awful rash or fungus or something worse.

"I caught the BIGGEST fish you've ever seen! You should have seen it!"

"What? Where?"

"At the canal. I just threw my line in and I could see the fish coming and then I had him. It was a big, big bass."

"How big?"

And of course he unwittingly tells his first fish tale. But his grandmother confirms that it was BIG.

They didn't have a camera. And I wasn't there. Wouldn't you know it.

Well, the kid is just as cool as he can be.

I had another chance to look bad on Friday. He wanted to go skate at the ice rink they've set up in the park. He skates. I never have. It was chance to put another chink in the myth.

As it turns out, I'm a better skater than fisherman.

This morning, I got a shock. I looked at the calendar and it is December 20! Is Christmas Friday? Holy smokes, I haven't even sent cards yet. What happened?

Suddenly, I feel the sadness and the gloom begin.