I think my trip to the Neu Gallerie this summer had an effect on my images. Some of them seem right out of the Weimar Republic. Of course, I flatter myself. I have one more "shoot" and then the project is over. Done. I will work with the images awhile and think about what to do next. I don't want to work with people right now. It drains me. I am anxious for twenty-four hours before "the shoot." Afterwards, I am exhausted. It is difficult to meet people, I think. I tend to stay to myself mostly, so it takes a monumental effort for me to say, "May I take your photograph." It is always a scary (ad)venture. I'd like to photograph tools or something else inanimate. I'm not really interested in such imagery that much. I'm just worn out. Like Greta Garbo, I want to be alone.
Which may be a bad sign in itself. Is there some pathology at work when what you look forward to most is coming home to dinner alone with a movie or a book or some small creation? Last night, for instance, I came home to eat and watch the first episode of the new season of "Mad Men" that I missed the night it aired. I downloaded it onto my MacBook and watched it on the laptop with earbuds in place. And I thought it tremendous fun. I am afraid that I will become a misanthrope. I will have to be very careful. I don't want to become too much like that Sebastian character in "Blade Runner."
I recently finished a large project (6+ years), too. The depression that settled over me in the aftermath has only recently lifted. I have no advice.
ReplyDeleteIf it is a disease I have it too...maybe it's contagious and I can blame it on you... :)
ReplyDeleteB, Six years is a long time. Must have been like a rebirth. As always, the best advice is. . . .
ReplyDeleteR, I'm only a carrier, but I've been called an enabler, so there's that.
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