Deep by Deep

(photo by John Olav Riise)

I'm loosing the big 44" Epson printer that another artist has been storing at my studio.  It will be gone next week.  I have become addicted to printing large, so I don't know what I will do.  I can buy one for $6,000. I can maybe get a used one for half that price.  Or I can go small.  I wasn't prepared for this, but I'm never prepared for anything, really.  Who is?

I feel abandoned.

I'm sick this morning and going back to bed.  Blow after blow.  Sometimes I think life is like a bad parent who comes home drunk and beats on you.  It is occasional and you believe that he will quit, that each time will be the last.  But as soon as he sees you getting too happy. . . .

There are beautiful days, too.  At least I remember some that were.  I'll go back to bed and dream.

all by all and deep by deep, 
and more by more, they dream their sleep


(from "anyone lived in a pretty how town" by e.e. cummings)