Provided No Addendum: Addendum

The day was a bust.  It wasn't just mental.  I was ill.  Bad G.I. stuff, slight fever, dizziness, vertigo.  None of it devastating, just debilitating.  So a lovely day was spent mostly indoors.  Toward it's end, I ran some errands which let me know I wasn't exaggerating my sickness, and while out, I decided to buy a good bottle of wine, two steps up from the sort of stuff I usually put on my table.  That is just the thing to do for a bad stomach, I say.  Baby it with expensive things.  So I got a t-bone, too, a nice looking one.  I am preparing it with Brussels sprouts. The wine is good now, but I don't think all of this will stay with me long.  I'm "calming" my stomach, though, with aged Manchega cheese, preparing it for what is to come.  As I say, I have a mild, not a desperate, case.

Today there were little things to cheer me up.  Emails from the girl I shot with the other night and from the  makeup artist, too.  And there were some sweet private emails from readers of the blog that warmed me.  And there was this from Q:

I think it's great that you portray yourself as the overly melancholy batman of pornography.

I love this sort of thing because I know him and care for him, so don't take offense at this.  I am able to say things to him that would end relationships with almost any other person.  It is fun and funny and not to be taken as anything but that.  He is terrific company when things get boring.

John Minnicks, the creator of "The Liberator," has been emailing me about a new camera creation I want him to make.  He confuses me with all the technical things he asks me, but if anyone can figure this out, he can.  So there is something to look forward to there.

And getting emails from Bob Crowley over at New 55 Film has inspired me again.

Rhonda has begun a new blog and is posting almost every day, so there is that to look forward to.  And Frank Petronio has changed his website and is active there again.

Late today, I unexpectedly heard from the photographer Ed Ross whose work I am crazy for.  And 591 Photography Blog has been especially good lately showing works of some really great photographers.  I've especially fallen for the works of Gordon Chapman who I know nothing about, but you should look at his works here.

And if you have been watching the blog for awhile, you will remember the little boy who was pictured in so many posts.  He came over just to chat last night, and he has grown too much.  When I asked him what he had been doing, he said he had been at church getting ready for his conformation.  I gave him a wry smile and said, "Well. . . I bet that was fun," to which he gave back an ironic chuckle and said, "Yeah."  Then he looked at me seriously and said, "You used to tell me that nature was your church.  Was that true?"  "Sure," I said, "sure it was true."  Then he asked, "Do you believe in God?"    "Remember?" I said,  "God is Everything, and Everything is God.  Remember that?"  He nodded.  "That means what you do and what I do, too.  It is all part of that thing we call God.  We are little Godheads, you see?  I'll explain that to you when you are ready.  It won't make sense now, but maybe later it will."

His eyes were lit.  I know it doesn't make any sense to him presently, but it makes an impression, and he trusts me to tell him what I think.  I know he doesn't get much like this elsewhere.  When he was little, we used to do math every morning, and he was eager to learn it, and leaped grade levels above his class just by playing for half an hour in the mornings.  Maybe soon he can skip ahead in some other things as well.  That is what I thought when he hugged me goodbye, taking a little bit of me with him.

And maybe that is why I got sick.  Not because he left, but because he came.  He had stayed home from school that day with some illness.  And maybe that is why today all incoming messages were so well received and appreciated.  I had been exposed/tenderized.

As a bachelor is wont to due, I have eaten my meal while making this entry.  The wine was good and the Brussels sprouts delicious, but the steak was a bit tough for what I spent.  I overcooked it, though, as I was writing and not paying enough attention.  Now the cat waits for scraps as my dog Wiley used to do.  I spoil creatures so.

As I suspected, I feel better now, not worse.  I am like a homeopath, like Rasputin.  Don't take antibodies, take the antigens.  Make the body work to live.  By tomorrow I will be tip-top and harder than nails.  But tonight, slightly weepy, I have offered this.

Provided that there is no addendum in the morning.

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Addendum:  Sore throat.