Originally Posted Friday, October 3, 2014
It is Friday, a day when the blog experiences "low flow." It is O.K. I have little I want to say publicly. Little to say privately for that matter. I am walking through the fire right now physically and emotionally. People are difficult and it is best to stay away from them. I have learned that, but it is always difficult not to be lured by the sights and sounds of the carnival. The body is frail and can only take so much abuse. It is a dying thing. The only force that keeps it going is the mind, but eventually that wears out as well. Life is pain and pleasure, and fortunately for us we remember pleasure much better than we remember pain. Every bad adventure trip is transformed by the interaction of time and memory. And so we go on because we remember how much fun the carnival is. But there comes a day when the pain is too present and overwhelms the memory, and that is when things change irrevocably. I am not there yet, so don't call the hotline, but I am an acute observer and have experienced much. The things that sustain us don't last no matter how we try to cling. In the end, I am convinced, there is a simple letting go.
I am letting go of some things. Not everything. Everyone becomes a monk in the end or they are eaten by the stuff they try to hold onto (pictures of apartments filled with newspapers and memorabilia dance before my mind's eye). As the comedian Stephen Wright said, "You can't have everything. Where would you put it."
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