Your Brain and the Shifting Time

Good article in the New York Times this morning about receptors in the brain that love cannabinol, opioids, cocaine, etc.  Some people have higher levels of things like GABA and anandamide that lowers their anxiety levels and raises their bliss.  They are less likely to get addicted to or even enjoy most drugs.  I don't enjoy most drugs.  Pot puts me to sleep, so there is that.  Coke has no effect on me.  I do enjoy opioids and, of course, alcohol.  This spring, Q and I will go to a coastal desert and trip until our brains are clean and clear again.  There is always the need for recalibration. 

Truth is, I don't enjoy drugs, and it is good to know there may be a biological rather than a psychological reason.  I was always the straight kid in my crowd.  I love to feel good, and I get blissful from eating well and exercising and going to bed early.  This is not a thing I developed in later life, either.  My college roommate and I were like that from the start.  Good books flooded us with dopamine.  Great and wonderful vistas, too.  Jesus, there is nothing like rounding a turn in the road and seeing the world before you.  It brings you close to creation. 

I am prone from time to time to anxiety and/or depression, but running has always been a cure for that.  It changes the chemicals in my brain, I think.  But travel works, too.  As an ex-friend used to say about suicide, "Why?  The interstate is just outside the door." 

I woke this morning to a text that came in an hour earlier than my clock said it was.  What?  I didn't know we "sprung ahead" last night.  Here is a thing that fucks with people's circadian rhythms.  Hell, I'd posit that it is one of the reasons people need so many drugs to get through their lives.  Why do they fuck with the time?  Nobody likes it.  Nobody says, "Oh, I just can't wait to shift the time back and forth.  I love that feeling."  Nobody enjoys jet lag.  It is a symbol, though, of Power and Authority.  It is a reason to hate the government.  Elect me president, and I will do away with the changing of the clocks.  You can rest easy.  Clean out the medicine cabinet.  There will be peace. 

O.K.  So today's picture doesn't look like something I'd do.  It isn't.  I shot this for the model.  We never got around to my stuff.  She must have thought she was paying me for the shoot.  She'd been in a few magazines, though, and I guess she thought she was doing me a favor.  Still, when I looked at the pictures, it was fun to have done something like this.  We were selling a necklace, I think.  QVC.  Get it quick.  Get it now. 

The clouds seem to be gone.  The sky is blue again and the air incredibly clear.  I look forward to brunch outside.  It is good to have something to look forward to, even if it is something so small.