Hormonal?

  

Yesterday was gorgeous.  People were out in abundance.  The Boulevard was as crowded as I've ever seen it as were the outdoor bars and restaurants I drove by.  I didn't stop.  Sometimes the beauty of the day inspires you, sometimes it oppresses.  It was too much for me.  I decided to eschew all exercise and  came home and made a morning's Bloody Mary.  I drank it outside on the sunny deck.  

But there were  things that had to be done.  First the grocery shopping for my mother's evening meal.  Then I decided to get some plants to replace the dead ones on the mantle.  They were no longer on the mantle, actually.  I had taken them outside weeks ago.  Dying plants can be so depressing.  I decided to drive to the nearest nursery.  A nice lady helped me through the darkened plant section, but she said that it was too dark in there and that they didn't have anything suitable for growing inside.   I had suspected as much before I went, but I needed to get out of the house.  I decided to make my way to the little store I knew I should have gone to all along, a specialty shop that sells only plants for the house.  

I couldn't find it.  This has happened before.  I thought I knew where it was, but I drove up and down the street several times and never saw it.  Frustrated, I went home.  But I didn't get out of the car.  I sat there for a good long while before I Googled the place.  The location I was searching for didn't show up.  The only one was off the Boulevard.  I started the car and tried again.  

Everyone was having fun.  I can't know that.  They could have been miserable.  But they were out in droves.  I didn't feel equal to the parade.  

I bought two small Silvery Anns.  They don't require much light or water.  I think these are the plants Ili and I bought long ago, the ones I let die.  I replaced them with something that didn't do well on the mantle.  I am happy to have these again.  They will do fine.  

Then I made another Bloody Mary and sat outside.  The sun was shining, the day sparkling.  I decided to take a nap.  

I fell deep into that hole, sleeping hard, knowing that I was sleeping hard, unable to wake up though I knew it was time to begin making dinner, but I couldn't wake up.  I couldn't move.  

At the very last moment, half an hour too late, I popped up and began the evening preparations.  I braised the chicken thighs and sautéed the veggies, put everything in the big pot with chicken broth and wine, and got it into the oven just before my mother arrived.  

"Do you want a glass of wine?"

It was the first time my mother has been over for dinner for over a year.  We sat outside while the meal cooked.  We drank more wine.  

Dinner was good, but I burned my fingers badly taking the lid off the 350 degree pot.  Probably won't make that mistake again.  

My mother left just prior to sunset so she could drive home before dark.  It was still a long while before bedtime.  I didn't bother with the old full moon. 

I must take my car into the shop this morning.  I will have to walk the five miles home.  Of course, for the first time in weeks, there is a chance of rain.  Gray sky.  Etc. 

I listened to music all afternoon on my iTunes station.  Hadn't heard this one for a long time.  Another sad song about habit.  I must be hormonal.